Monty Home Alone – Christmas 2017

It’s Christmas again and this time of the year

The whole world and Wigwam is filled with good cheer

My story this time begins here at home

So sit down and relax it’s me new festive poem

It was a week before the big day and this year was quite strange

The whole family was going away for a change

Not just the hoomans but the animals too

Maybe they’d just booked a week’s stay in a zoo

No, just a big house in Wales is where we were going

And the night before we left it had just started snowing

It was busy that evening more crazy than ever

The whole family were round we were travelling together

Hoomans everywhere and spangles underfoot

Mum trying to remember where everything had been put

In all the commotion comes a knock at the door

The postyman with a delivery though I hadn’t seen him before

I barked anyway cos I feel that I must

Plus, there was something about him that I just didn’t trust

He asked lots of questions, ‘Were we going away?’

Dad said we were off till a week Saturday

He’d seen all the luggage and was just having a chat

Though I did suspect there was more to it than that

It soon got forgotten in the mayhem of the evening

Everything needed sorting cos first thing we’d be leaving

The hoomans all ordered a takeaway meal

While us doglets all attempted to see what we could steal

A big piece of cheese Pizza dropped from someone’s hand

I was off in an instant to where it would land

Just as I got there Bailey appeared like a ghost

He did exactly the same when someone dropped toast

This time I was angry as he swallowed it whole

That was my cheesy titbit that spangle had stole

I showed him me teeth and he showed me his too

Then the table went flying there’d be trouble I knew

I was sure that Bailey would be told for his actions

But instead Dad told me off for causing the faction

‘Get to your room Monts’ dad said with a shout

No fish treat or nothing and then it was lights out

I was angry and upset it just wasn’t fair

If I never saw them again I just wouldn’t care

Sleep came, I was tired and I snored through the night

When I opened my eyes, it was quiet and light

Suddenly I remembered what had happened before

So, I was really quite sheepish as I came out my door

It was all very still there was no one about

As I went through the house there was simply no doubt

The more I looked round the more it became clear

I’d only gone and done it…..I’d made my family disappear

The family had slept in they had woken up late

They had a train booked to catch so they just couldn’t wait

In the taxi they counted was everyone there?

All present and correct as was a toy Panda Bear

It sat in the seat and they thought it was me

And off they all went for their week by the sea

The snow now was heavy as they headed for Wales

And lots more was forecast made worse by strong gales

Meanwhile back in Wigwam I was having a blast

I thought I’d enjoy it as long as it lasts

The house was all mine, no hooman in sight

It was all really fun till it got to the night

I was a bit scared cos it was all very dark

Suddenly at the window someone made me bark

They were trying to get in when I barked though they ran

But I recognised one of them that dodgy postyman

Would they come back was my biggest fear

But the more that I thought the more it became clear

Protecting the home was my job that’s for sure

So, I best be prepared in case they’re hungry for more

I drew up me plans this was it, this was war

They’d regret if they tried coming in through our door

Those hoomans would see if they needed some proof

You don’t ever mess with a smart Newfydoof

Upstairs I went quickly and where mum and dad slept

Was something to help me now just find where it’s kept

A bag full of makeup would make me look good

With terrifying fangs dripping with blood

Now just settle down and wait for the night

I began to get nervous in the fading daylight

But deep down inside though scared I was proud

This was Monty Dogge’s house….No burglars allowed.

Meanwhile back in Wales the journey went on

They still hadn’t realised someone was gone

All of a sudden mum knew it though she didn’t know how

‘Monty’ she screamed where is our Pandacow?

By the time that they noticed the snow had stopped travel

There was nothing but let this strange story unravel

Though they tried to make contact I can’t answer the phone

I’m not sure what they thought….I’m a dog home alone

That night they came back those norty bad men

Sure, the house would be empty they tried it again

This time it was easy it was quiet and still

They sneaked through the house with their postbags to fill

Though my phone skills are poor my typing is ok

So, I sent out an email earlier that day

I just hoped it would work cos I had a plan

When suddenly outside I spotted a van

That was my signal and I ran down the stairs

Those intruders will be getting the scare of all scares

I was barking and growling and they let out a scream

And they turned a strange colour if you know what I mean

They just turned and ran straight out of the door

And there with a welcome was the long arm of the law

I found out much later that these criminal misfits

Had been hunted for ages they’re the postbag bandits

The cops when they left asked if I’d be all right

Though I said that I would I just didn’t feel right

This being alone isn’t all that much fun

I was missing the family strangely each one of them

It was now Cwissymouse Eve and I drifted to sleep

And as usual for me that slumber was deep

Outside suddenly there arose such a clatter

And I got from my bed to see what was the matter

I know that I stole those lines from another

But they’re really too good not to use in this cover

For a moment I thought that the villains were back

So, I was ready and waiting for another attack

I went to the door and what should I see?

It was everyone gathered….the whole family

They had travelled back home just as soon as they could

And seeing them all made me feel really good

So that is me tale of a strange Cwissymouse

Where I got left for a while on me own in the house

Though I thought that I wanted there just to be me

I realised how much I missed my family

We may not be perfect but we’re there for each other

Even Bailey the Spangle me annoying small brother

I understand now why having family is good

Cos as much fun as it was……I couldn’t open me food